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1. When being chased by evil in the dark woods, it's probably best if you don't fall.
2. Never trust the living dead.
3. Never go outside after dark and wander the woods alone.
4. When your friends are possessed by evil, put
your personal feelings aside and dismember them to save your own hide.
5. Never stay in a dumpy, isolated cabin in
the middle of nowhere with four friends because chances are pretty good you won't survive the night.
6. When confronted
by an insanely off-the-wall creepy situation, always be optimistic.
7. If you're the single person in the group,
you'll most probably be the first to die or be possessed.
8. Never go anywhere that has only one rickety bridge as
the way out.
9. Never, ever go near a dead body because 9 times out of 10 that body isn't as dead as you thought
it was and it'll surely reach out and grab you.
10. Never go down into basements.
11. Never bury a supposedly
dead body unless it has been sufficiently hacked into pieces.
12. Never lean over a grave. The dead don't like that
and will come up to kick your ass.
13. When looking for something evil, it's usually always behind you.
14.
When things are deathly silent or creepy music is playing, there's a pretty good chance something is about to happen.
15. If you're the last one left alive of your group of friends, don't worry too much. You'll live to see the sequel.
16. If you survive 'til morning, you're in the clear, at least until sunset because for some reason, the majority
of evil things only come out at night.
17. Never stand in front of doors or windows.
18. It would probably
just be easier to join the evil dead rather than fight them.
19. Evil beings excrete massive amounts of blood so
make sure to pack some extra changes of clothes.
20. Don't read from anything entitled "The Book of the Dead."
You're just asking for trouble.
***It's probably best if you just never leave your house again.***
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